Familiarity

Hey friends and HELLO fall!

I don't know where you are reading this from, but down in Texas we have been burning in the "fall" heat... until today! Today, it's in the 60s and I could not be more excited! Fall and winter are my favorite times of the year. It reminds me of family, cuddling with my hubs, coffee with friends, and so much more. So fall, you are welcome here!

This morning I was reading from a book that I am currently reading called Wife in Pursuit by Selena Fredrick. First off, I highly recommend this for all you wives. It is so easy to forget that after you get married, you should be pursing your husband more then ever. This book is a great reminder of daily ways we can continue to draw closer and love our husbands. They also have a book for your hubbys called Husband in Pursuit that go hand in hand. They are so good and so worth it!

This morning, Selena brought up a topic that I always see as positive. Familiarity. There is a good type of familiarity, but there is also a bad. Here they are. 1. Being familiar with your husband in a way that you can share vulnerable pieces of your heart and truly trust him. This is healthy and good. 2. The kind of familiarity where you let the little things get the best of you and you end up nit picking because... "it's just Shea (insert your husbands name here)."

Gah... I hate the second type of familiarity! When I read that phrase, "its just _____," I wanted to cry. Sometimes we forget how loved, valuable, and important our husbands are. Are they perfect? Nah. But they are loved, forgiven, and important to God. And you may be saying, "Chandler, my husband doesn't do ___." or "My husband constantly ____." Let me tell you something hard, something that was a sucker punch to my pride. My husband does things when I'm not looking just like I do things when he is not looking. We don't always see each other doing the things that provide and protect our families. My husband could easily point out all the things "I don't do right."

Let's stop being the second type of familiar. More of the first! Something else Selena mentioned is that when we as wives are able to see the good in our husbands and speak kindly to them, we reap the benefits. Our husbands are in return able to feel loved and love us back. Call out the truth and good in your husbands, ladies (cough CHANDLER).

I am also aware that this message is not for every lady out there. I know there are marriages where there is so much pain and hurt that there is more needed than learning to be the right kind of familiar. This message is not judgement to anyone, just a reminder to those who need it.

You hear it all the time, marriage is hard. Sure. Yup. Of course. Marriage is hard because life is hard. Relationships are hard. This is all true. But don't lose sight of how worth it they are. We are called to love God first and our husbands second. We are also called to see people the way God sees them. And God sees your husbands as precious and worth dying for. God would have died on the cross if it were ONLY for your husband. Let's starting loving them more like our Heavenly Father does.

I do not take credit for any of these truths. Wife in Pursuit has been such a game changer and I just wanted to share a little about my thoughts of it. If you are a wife or a husband, go on Amazon and order now!

Love you guys and hope you all get to enjoy this wonderful fall weather!

Chandler